In 100 years of Hindi films, there are hardly any romantic
stories that have heroes who could sweep a woman off her feet or guys that girls
can dream about. We have often lamented that Hindi movies show no respect for
women and that the portrayal of women is too poor. If songs call girls ‘item’,
‘maal’ and suchlike, it is not an incorrect complaint either. Frankly for all the romanticization of the
character of Devdas he is hardly a guy a girl will want. He treated two strong
women badly and dumped them – after which he spent a lifetime feeling sorry for
himself.
There have been heroes who have ranged from obsessive to
scary obsessive (outstanding example, Darr)
where they want to harm the object of their affection. There have been wimps waiting
for the women to take risks and go to them (examples, Taal and Dilwale Dulhaniya Le
Jayenge. The latter, one of the biggest romantic hits, shows the guy
continually telling the girl to wait and finally chooses to go away – leaving
the heroine to actualise the love story.). There are guys who do their own
thing till they decide it is time to “settle” down and return to the eternally
waiting woman (examples, Love Aaj Kal and
Yeh Jawani Hai Diwani).
Don’t get me wrong here – all these movies have been entertaining.
The grouse is about perpetuating a fallacy that women want this kind of a man
or feel romanced and loved by this behaviour. They don’t.
So far, in the thousands of Hindi movies made, there have
been just three men who made, and make, a woman feel loved.
- Vanraj (Ajay Devgan) from Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam
It is not the fact that Vanraj took
Nandini in search for her past love that makes him an incredible lover. It is
the fact that he loved so totally that he accepted everything about her. Love
puts the happiness of the loved one first. The turning point for Vanraj’s
character is the scene between him and his father. The father tells Vanraj to
be a man. And Vanraj expostulates his idea of what a man should be.
Vanraj’s selfless love tied
Nandini to him and ultimately she chooses him. Vanraj showed that love is
unconditional.
- Rahul (Shahrukh Khan) in his first relationship from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
The first half of Kuch Kuch Hota Hai is all about the
blossoming love and romance between Shahrukh Khan and Rani Mukherji. Though
ultimately the movie is supposed to be the story of Shahrukh and Kajol, the
true love story in this celebrated romantic movie is the other one. “Mardon ka sar sirf teen auraton ke saamne
jhukta hai. Apni Ma, Devi Ma aur...” he first tells her and then confesses
his love for her by just bowing his head to her and saying “aur”. Every woman wants to be the “aur”. That makes her feel special. Rahul is irresistible because
his love is complete surrender.
- Anand Babu (Rajesh Khanna) from Amar Prem
A much older movie, but an
ageless love. She, a tawaif with a
devastating past and a sordid present. He, a rich, heartbroken customer. While
he came to the bazaar to run away
from his demons, he loves her enough to be her emotional anchor giving her
both, sympathy and empathy. Love rises above self to be a support in every way.
Anand Babu’s love is both large and eternal.